


Have A Heart And Try Me...

by dedevian-t (ADotBurrna)



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, College AU, Connor's just horny for nerds, Elijah is a professor, Fluff, Human AU, M/M, Masturbation, Slow Burn, Smut, everyone is 18+ so don't worry gays, probably, professor/student, theres usually angst in my stories so :/
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 09:29:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18008339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ADotBurrna/pseuds/dedevian-t
Summary: ...cause without love I won't survive."Connor starts his life at college. What he didn't know was that he would fall for the cold and analytical professor. And, more surprisingly, that said professor would fall for him too.(Title from "Love Hurts" by Incubus.)





	1. The First Day

**Author's Note:**

> Well, hello and welcome to my first long Kamcon fic! I hope you stick around for the next chapters. Enjoy! <3

Connor woke up early that day, incapable of sleeping a bit more while knowing it would be his first day at college, even if his classes would only start in the afternoon. He got up from the bed quickly, leaving his small room to go directly to the kitchen and fix himself his breakfast.

He took a moment to look at his new apartment as he walked through it. It was small and, if it wasn't for the small hallway that took him to his room, it would be just a bedroom with a kitchen. The boy groaned as he remembered that, even being small, it was expensive enough for him to have to rely on his parents to help pay for his expenses since he wasn't able to get a job yet. He desperately needed money...

Not only he needed it to pay for his apartment and the essential things he needed to live, his college wasn't cheap either. His parents agreed to pay a part of it, but it still was lot of money for him to get. Even if he was just starting college now those things already bothered him a lot.

Deciding to try and not think about money anymore, he quickly made toasts and egg and sat down on his small couch, turning the TV on and starting to watch the local news, only using the noise to stop him from being nervous for his first day of college and the burden of becoming, in a way, independent.

He noticed the sound of his phone ringing back on his room as a few texts arrived for him, letting them come as he finished his breakfast. He quickly took his phone in his hands, going back to the couch to lay down on it and seeing Niles' name on the screen.

[7:20 am] Niles: _Hey Con, just wanted to check in on you and see how you were_.

[7:21 am] Niles: _I'll be at school in a few minutes but try to text me before I go to class you lazy ass._

[7:21 am] Niles: _Gavin texted me saying that he'll be waiting for you at college to help you know around._

[7:22 am] Niles: _H_ _e also said for you to "fuck off". He meant good morning._

Connor chuckled at his brother's texts, sighing after and wishing he was there with him. Unfortunately, Niles was still finishing highschool — being a year younger than Connor and all that —, but at least he felt some kind of relief by knowing Gavin would be there.

He and his brother's boyfriend weren't really friends, Niles had given up on trying to get them to be friends with each other at some point, but — for Niles' sake — they both treated each other as nice as possible so the younger would be happy. He'd do everything for Niles, even if it meant enduring Gavin Reed's stupidity that somehow made Niles fall for him. Connor just guessed he had a kink for dumb people or something.

With a sigh, he finally texted Niles back.

[7:45 am] you: _hey Niles, I'm fine, just a little nervous. tell Gavin I hope he doesn't get late since I know he has to take the stick that's up his ass before meeting me._

[7:46 am] Niles: _I'll tell him that you said you're grateful and wishing him a good morning._

[7:46 am] you: _thanks. how's everything at home?_

Niles quickly texted how his parents were. According to Niles, their dad was as nervous as always before leaving late for work again, and their mom was upstairs at her desk, typing a new article about something Niles didn't bother to ask before leaving to take the bus to school. He quickly gave an update about how their cat was by sending a picture he took early of the cat laying with his legs completely spread on the ground as he slept. That made Connor smile a little bit, he would miss Muffin a lot.

After a few texts, Niles had to go since his classes started soon, leaving Connor alone again. He again wished his brother was there to help him. Niles had always been the assertive one and were capable of making Connor logic his nervousness until he was feeling fine again. Instead, he was alone in a small apartment in the middle of Detroit, starting to get terrified of what would happen next in his life.

***

Connor was on his way to college, walking while looking around to get used to the new neighborhood, letting his memory keep the small houses and apartments that he went through before arriving at the campus, seeing already a big concentration of people there. He looked around, seeing a familiar figure far away next to some trees.

Gavin was talking to a group of people, probably his friends, and soon noticed Connor walking towards him, saying goodbye to the group before walking towards Connor too.

"Anderson..." Gavin said in his normal passive aggressive tone that only went away when he was talking to Niles. Connor smirked.

"Reed."

"Welcome to hell. Ready to see where you'll spend the next four years of your life?"

"Show me the way."

Gavin nodded shortly, putting his hands on the pockets of his jacket and walking, expecting Connor to just follow him, which the younger did, quickly walking by Gavin's side.

They quickly entered the building that Connor could only assume it was the one where he would have his classes. Connor chose the Philosophy course, being one of his favorite subjects when he was in highschool. He liked the millions of questions that it brought to his mind. It made him think. He had a plan to major in something related to laws, but that was still something that was far away for him. But that didn't mean that he couldn't dream.

"This" Gavin interrupted his thoughts, pointing to a classroom near them. "is the classroom for your class today. Niles managed to get your chronogram and give it to me so I could show you properly the important places."

Connor looked at the classroom door, swallowing and taking a deep breath. His first class would start in an hour and he didn't know what to expect. Gavin slightly poked his shoulder, making Connor look at him, seeing the guy with his eyebrows raised.

"You were making that dumb face you do when you're nervous." Connor narrowed his eyes and Gavin simply shrugged, smirking. "Don't worry about it, Anderson. You're as smart as your brother and you'll do well here. Now come on, we still have to meet the rest of the place."

He followed Gavin, taken aback by his abnormally kind words, trying to believe the guy as he saw the hallways of the building, too lost in his own thoughts to memorize everything, more worried about his new life.

***

His first class was "Introduction to Philosophy of Science". Gavin told him earlier that the professor for that class was one of the best ones they had, but also was very harsh with his students.

" _Elijah Kamski..._ " Gavin had said, looking slightly annoyed just by saying the name. " _He's a brilliant man. But also a brilliant motherfucker. He will ruin your life if you cross the line with him. I don't think you'll have any problems though._ "

He kept thinking about Gavin's words as he sat down in a place in the front — one of the few that were left since the classroom was already full when he arrived —, looking around discreetly to take in the faces of the people around him. But his mind was in another place: the professor.

With the way Gavin talked about him, the image Connor had of the professor on his mind was of a old grumpy man with a mean expression that probably talked too loud and moved his arms around too much. All things that Connor hated. So when a middle aged man entered the room with a neutral expression, he frowned a little, realizing that the man was the infamous Elijah Kamski.

Connor took a moment to take in the appearance of the professor, almost enjoying looking at him as he realized he was actually handsome. The long hair he had was in a ponytail, his glasses slightly crooked on his face before he neatly adjusted them. He was wearing a white button up shirt and jeans that Connor noticed only enhanced his natural beauty, but the part that caught more of Connor's attention were his eyes. The blue irises covered by the lens of the glasses seemed cold and indifferent as he placed his stuff on his desk and looked around to his students, stopping for a moment to look at Connor once he noticed the boy was staring at him.

Connor blushed and looked away, feeling completely embarrassed.

Elijah soon turned his eyes to look at the rest of the class before starting to speak, surprising Connor once more as his voice wasn't loud as he was expecting.

"Good afternoon, I'm Elijah Kamski. I'm your professor for the Introduction to Philosophy of Science class, and soon your professor for Philosophy of Science once we finish this." he ran his eyes through the whole classroom, trying to get the attention of everyone in that room. "I would like to start your first day by asking what you think what Philosophy of Science is. Anyone?"

Connor didn't see from the place he was, but someone raised their hands and answered with some witty commentary. He turned his look to Elijah again, seeing the man smirk and shake his head in disapproval.

"Very funny, but no. Someone with an _actual answer_ would like to speak?"

Connor hesitated but raised his hand, catching Elijah's attention before swallowing and almost frowning visibly to himself. He was never that shy in school, always stood his ground and didn't have a problem to talk in public. It was ridiculous for him to do that now that he was in college. He changed his demeanor completely after that, making Elijah frown slightly with the change in the body language of the boy.

"It's a study of the fundamentals and the philosophical implications of science."

Elijah smiled. Connor blushed.

"Better. Not the full answer but way better than the joke we've heard, I assume." Connor could hear a few chuckles here and there, probably making fun of the person who made the joke. "But yes, the philosophy of science is here for us to doubt of a few parts of science in itself, like the nature of the scientific affirmations and concepts and the way they're made and many other matters that we will be seeing in our classes."

Elijah reclined his body on his desk, making Connor look at him even more intensely. He didn't want to do that, but the man in front of him was way more attractive than he was expecting, and he talked in a way that made him sound intelligent. Connor was always attracted to intelligence. Not only that, but Elijah didn't move around as much as Connor was expecting — which he hated because it only distracted him from the class to look at the person's hands or whatever part of the body they were flailing around as they spoke. Elijah had a very still demeanor, moving only to walk slowly from side to side so the whole class could see and hear him. His hands, even when moving, were kept next to his own body, which wasn't enough to distract someone enough to stop them to pay attention on the subject he was talking about, and Connor started to wonder if this was on purpose so his students didn't get distracted while he was talking. Even his voice seemed to be a way to keep you interested in what he was saying, and Connor enjoyed that.

Elijah was, in the least, very interesting to Connor.

He blinked a few times, going back to normal as Elijah's eyes turned a tad bit colder, as if he was about to threaten everyone in that room — which he, in fact, was going to do.

"I ask all of you not to miss my classes and be very careful. This is a place to learn and, as much as I respect all of you, I expect the same kind of respect towards me." his voice could be heard clear in the silent room, and Connor swallowed, knowing exactly that was a warning for his students. "There's a few things I don't tolerate in my class, and if any of you think of doing, I'll make sure to make your life a bit more difficult than it already is. With that being said, I'll put on the board the class chronogram of everything we'll be seeing in this period. I kindly ask for all of you to take notes."

Elijah then turned to the board and started writing, some people taking notebooks or laptops out of their pockets to take notes, others seeming to defy Elijah's words and staying still. Connor didn't want to test his luck and soon he was taking notes, looking slightly at the man in the front of the room as he was concentrated in his own words that he wrote.

* * *

 


	2. First Thoughts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello y'all, thanks for reading the first chapter and coming to this one! Before you start to read this one I need to clarify a couple of things.
> 
> 1) It's been pointed out to me that it was confusing to know Gavin's place in the story, so let me just explain real quick the ages of everyone here: Niles is 18, finishing highschool, Connor is 19 and Gavin is 20. Gavin and Connor are in college, and the same one for that matter, just different courses. I'm sorry it wasn't clear enough and thank you to the person that pointed it out to me for being nice about it! I still have a few problems to let stuff clear for my readers sometimes, and it doesn't help that my first language isn't english lmao but I hope it's clear now that I explained it.
> 
> 2) The first 3 chapters of this are more introductory to set the world and get you to know the characters a little better so you can kinda "empathize" with them and understand why they act like this and stuff like that. Chapter 3 is already writen and will be posted in a few days and it'll be a chapter from the perspective of Elijah. So please remember this is a slow burn and take it easy, things ARE going to happen! I promise!
> 
> 3) Enjoy the chapter! <3

When the class finally ended after Elijah giving a brief explanation of all of the topics he put on the board — and after another smooth warning that all of the books they would read for the semester were on those topics and he would absolutely be expecting people to participate during class, which meant he wanted everyone to read the books so they would know what they were talking about —, Connor left the classroom with a good feeling.

He was afraid he wouldn't be good enough for college, but something in that class gave him his confidence back. Not only that, he enjoyed Elijah's class and were definitely excited for his next class on the next monday. He almost felt sad that he would have to wait a whole week to see the professor again.

As he was walking up the steps that led to the door, he heard a voice calling for someone and instinctively looked behind him, seeing a blonde guy looking at him with a small smile on his lips and his phone in the guy's hand. Connor's eyebrows raised as he noticed he forgot his phone on his seat.

"Hey, you were sitting by my side and you left your phone." the guy gently smiled at him, making Connor smile back.

"Thank you so much... I got too distracted during class, I didn't notice I forgot it."

The guy offered Connor's phone to him, which he gladly took back, offering his hand for the guy to shake moments after.

"I'm Connor."

"Simon. Nice to meet you." he shook Connor's hand, a small smile still on his face. "Be more careful next time with your stuff, Connor."

The brunette smiled, nodding and noticing movement at the end of the classroom. His eyes widened slightly once he saw Elijah going up the steps and turning his cold eyes towards Connor, once the two students were near the door. Simon looked behind to see what Connor was looking at but turned back to him quickly.

"Well, I have to go. My friends won't be happy if I make them wait too long for me. It was nice meeting you, Connor."

"Same with you..."

Simon was the first one to leave, followed by Connor who didn't turn again to see where Elijah was, getting slightly nervous once he saw the man walking by his side while looking at his phone, seemingly distracted by it. Connor tried to keep his cool, remembering Elijah was just another human like him.

A very intelligent and attractive one.

"What did you think of the class?"

Connor blinked a few times once he heard Elijah's voice. The man wasn't looking at him, focused on whatever he was doing on his phone. Connor swallowed, trying to keep his voice normal.

"Uh, it was great, Mr. Kamski. I look forward to the next one."

Elijah smirked and Connor couldn't tell if it was for him or for the phone. Either way, it made Connor blush slightly.

"Good. You seemed to be paying attention to what I said. Continue like that and you'll pass my classes very easily." this time, Elijah finally looked at Connor, and the intensity of the blue of his eyes up close made Connor almost take a step back.

Connor nodded, smiling at the man who smiled back before looking forward again, sighing seemingly tired. "See you next monday. Have a good evening."

And with that, Elijah walked a bit faster, exiting the building first and walking towards a parked car in the parking lot of the campus. Connor looked discreetly at the man as he drove away before stopping on his tracks and trying to process what happened. He brushed it off, realizing Elijah was probably looking for some opinion on how his class went, even if it was only an introductory class.

His thoughts were cut short after a familiar voice called him, making him turn around to see Gavin walking up to him.

"Hey Anderson, I was looking for you." he said, looking at Connor with his eyebrows raised. It was impressive how Gavin always looked down on people even if he didn't mean to. "I'm going to get pizza with some friends and since you have nothing better to do I thought you would enjoy meeting some people."

Connor thought about denying it, but he could see that — even with his passive aggressive tone — Gavin wasn't trying to be mean, he probably knew Connor wouldn't make friends so easily on the first day, and maybe Niles had a finger on it too, so he just nodded and started following Gavin to his car.

 

 

***

  
To his surprise, Connor ended up actually enjoying going out with Gavin and his friends. He thought he would just be an outcast in the middle of them, but Gavin's friends — Tina and Chris — ended up being really nice to him and he felt comfortable around them. Even Gavin was a good company that night, which surprised him the most.

Gavin was 20 years old, one year older than Connor, and were always a dickhead to him while in highschool. Things got slightly better once Niles stopped Gavin from making fun of Connor and, after a few months, the two were dating. It didn't stop Gavin from being a dick, but being with Niles somehow made him turn a tad bit nicer. For what Connor could see, being away from his parents made wonders to Gavin. He was still trying to be the best person in the room and had a douchy tone in his voice, but he was changed, and it was easy to see that in the way he talked to his friends and even Connor. He knew Niles was part of that change also, and he smiled slightly to himself with that.

They ended up taking a picture together to send it to Niles, both of them knowing the boy would love to see that they were hanging out together, and that was the moment Connor saw the texts on his phone. He opened them, seeing a bunch of them being Niles', asking how the day was going/been.

[7:55 pm] you: _sorry Niles, I got busy and didn't check the phone... im fine and the day was surprisingly good. i can call you later when i get home so we can talk._

[7:56 pm] Niles: _It's okay. Glad to know the day was good._

[7:56 pm] Niles: _Gav said you're with him earlier?_

[7:56 pm] you: _yeah, we're at a restaurant with some of his friends._

[7:57 pm] Niles: _I don't believe it. You two are always wanting to kill each other. There's_ _ **no way**_ _you two are just being friendly._

Connor snorted, sending him the picture they took earlier and putting the phone down for a while to go back to the conversation that was happening at the table. After a few moments, the subject of the conversation turned to him.

"So," Tina said, resting her chin on her hand and looking at Connor with her eyebrows raised, making Connor raise his own. "I've heard you had your first class and it was with Mr. Douche. How was it?"

Connor frowned for a second before realizing she was talking about Kamski.

"Oh, Mr. Kamski? It was nice. He's actually a really good professor."

All three of them made different expressions. Tina frowned, Chris raised an eyebrow, and Gavin just shrugged, too focused on eating his pizza.

"Really? He once was our substitute professor while Mrs. Flemming was sick." Chris pointed out, grunting slightly. "He was a pain in the ass."

"True." Tina backed his affirmation and shook her head. "He looks at people as if he's a god, honestly. He probably thinks he's the smartest person around."

"He probably is..." Gavin said, mouthful and pointing at Connor. "Do _not_ try to outsmart him. I know you liked doing that to the teachers in highschool, but that bitch's different."

Connor looked offended at Gavin, shaking his head. "I did not try to outsmart anyone in highschool! All I ever did was correct some wrong information."

"Yeah, and that's why half of the teachers didn't like you." Gavin raised his eyebrows once he saw Connor was about to contradict his words, making Connor huff. "He can and _will_ end you if you try it."

"Poor Johnny..." Tina shook her head. "He thought he could prove him wrong and Kamski not only proved he was indeed right but basically humiliated Johnny in front of the whole class..."

"Yeah but lets be honest, John was drunk in class that day and had no idea what he was talking about." Chris added, seemingly holding back a laugh. "He kinda deserved that."

"Either way, what I mean is: don't try to question him if you're not one hundred percent sure of what the fuck you're talking about." Gavin pointed at Connor with his piece of pizza before taking another bite.

"Noted..."

The conversation took a different path after that, but Connor didn't really pay attention to it, eating while thinking about their words and the professor he met earlier.

 

 

***

  
When Connor got home he didn't really did much, throwing his dirty clothes next to his bed and laying down, taking his phone and looking through his social media for a while before another message from Niles arrived. After a few messages, Connor decided to call him, putting the call on speaker and laying the phone on his chest, looking at the ceiling.

" _So you leave the town for three days to go to college and you become friends with my boyfriend?_ " Connor chuckled at the fake offence in Niles' voice. " _That's actually unacceptable. I've been trying to get you two to become friends for two years now!_ "

"Hey, what can I do. He's... different now. It's easier to be around him now that he isn't a total jerk."

" _Are you sure we're talking about the same Gavin?_ "

"Yeah! He was actually nicer today. Didn't look like the Gavin I met in highschool. He's a lot more friendly."

There was a moment of silence and Connor waited, knowing that Niles was thinking about something.

" _I miss him..._ " Connor's expression got sad as he heard his brother's voice going calmer. " _I haven't seen him in two months now._ "

"Maybe I can try to convince him to go with me back home this weekend."

Niles sighed, making Connor wish he was there so he could comfort him as he's been doing for the past year that Gavin went to college. Unfortunately, now Connor was there too.

" _No, I know he hates it here with his parents and everything. It's actually good to know he's changing now that he's free, in a way._ " Niles sighed again, making Connor pout while thinking about the brother feeling sad. " _But I'm not here to talk about the jerk I call a boyfriend. Tell me about your day. How was the first class?_ "

Connor stayed in silence for a moment as he thought about it, his mind going directly to Elijah and the small interaction they had after the class. His blue eyes came into his mind and he stopped to think about them. They were so intense and cold, as if he was constantly judging everything and everyone. Tina had said earlier he looked at people as if he was a god, and it wasn't hard to believe it. He was looking down at Connor as he talked to him, asking a mere mortal about his performance in class.

" _Did you sleep and forget to hang up?_ " Niles' voice cut his thoughts short, making Connor blink a few times to go back to reality.

"No, I'm here." he said quickly. "I was just... thinking about it. The first class was actually good. The professor was really good."

Niles stayed in silence for a few seconds and Connor swallowed, knowing well his brother wasn't having it. But, if he got suspicious, he probably thought it was better to let go, since he kept the conversation going.

" _Did you make any friends?_ "

Connor thought about it, frowning slightly. "Well, I hung out with Gavin's friends and they were both really nice and good companies... And I forgot my phone on the classroom and a guy came to give it back to me and we introduced ourselves quickly."

" _Was the guy cute?_ "

Connor rolled his eyes, laughing after with the question.

"Stop right there. I saw him once and only know his first name. I'm not interested in dating right now."

" _Your loss._ "

"You're dating Gavin- _fucking_ -Reed."

" _Incredible, right?"_

They both laughed, enjoying a nice and light conversation like the ones they had at home in the middle of the night.

They talked for a several more minutes, mostly about how things were at home and about Niles' day at school. Connor felt his heart hurt when Niles said he couldn't wait for highschool to be over so he could go to college and be with him and Gavin again. Once they both felt like it was enough talking they said their "goodnight"s and Connor was left with the silence of his room.

He put his phone aside, looking at the ceiling and reflecting about his first day for a few moments, sighing and hoping the other days would be like that: peaceful and good. He closed his eyes after a while and slowly fell asleep, feeling hopeful about the rest of the week.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and if you have anything you'd like to say about this chapter I would be more than happy to read it, so please leave a comment! <3


	3. The Other Side Of The Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! This is the last of the intoductory chapters, so nex chapter stuff is already going to happen ;) I'm posting this quick because I feel like waiting for more introduction is kinda meh so here you go!
> 
> Thank you all for reading it so far and I hope you enjoy this one.

As he parked on the parking lot of his building, Elijah sighed, happy to finally be home after another first day of college where he had to introduce himself to new students and try to keep his image of a dangerous man so they would know better than defying his word.

Deep down he knew that it was a dick move. He should try to be more accessible for his students. More friendly even. But the only way for him to get the respect he needed was by being an untouchable douche. And he would be lying if he said he didn't like it.

Elijah Kamski was smart enough to know that he had a superiority complex, but not humble enough to let go of it.

He exited his car, taking his belongings and locking it before walking to the elevator. As he put in the key on a panel and pressed the button for his apartment, he took his phone out, humming to himself as he saw there was no new messages from his sister in there. She was probably busy.

The elevator doors opened, revealing his dark lounge, the only source of light being the city lights that came through the glass that replaced a wall that lead to his balcony. He didn't have to look much before quickly noticing a figure sitting on his couch, with their back turned to him. One quick second look only made him roll his eyes and shake his head, smiling slightly to himself as he turned on the lights.

"You know..." he started saying calmly, putting his things next to the door, only taking his phone and charger out of his bag before turning to the the person again. "When I gave you the key to my apartment I expected _at least_ a warning that you would be coming over..."

He walked to the counter that separated the living room from the kitchen, placing his phone there and quickly putting it to recharge.

"What are you doing here, Chloe?"

"You say that as if you're not happy to see me, Eli."

The girl turned to him, her eyebrows up and a small and kind smile on her lips that made Elijah smile back whenever she did. It was borderline annoying to him how she managed to do that. She got up from the couch, going to him and hugging him tightly, making him sigh as he realized how he missed the girl before hugging her back.

"I came here to visit." she said as she pulled away from the hug, crossing her arms and standing in front of Elijah, her face still soft while looking at him. "It's boring to talk to you through texts. I wanted to see you again."

"You should've warned me, Chloe... There's nothing special in my fridge for you now."

"Nah, I don't need nothing to eat. I came to talk."

Elijah chuckled, nodding and raising his hands slightly as a way to show he wouldn't try to give her food, signing with his hand for her to go back to the couch, sitting down with her.

"What do you want to talk about?" Elijah asked, slightly curious.

"I don't know... Life?" the girl shrugged. "You keep being shady about yours whenever I ask about it..."

"That's because I don't have a life." he jokingly said, making Chloe slap his arm, which only made him laugh. "Seriously, I have _nothing_ new to say to you. Same thing as always. I'm not being shady, I just don't have anything to talk about when it comes to my life."

"Come on! You gotta be kidding me. You mailed me the key to this apartment that you bought last month and said ' _oh_ _it's nothing_ _much_ ', and then I come here now and it's a fucking dream of an apartment, not to mention probably more expensive than my life, so I'm sorry if I don't believe nothing interesting is happening in your life." she leaned back on the couch, crossing her arms and looking at him with her eyebrows raised. "Your definition of ' _nothing'_ is very different from mine apparently."

Elijah only looked at her blankly for a moment before looking away and shrugging.

"I know I don't talk much about myself, but you know that my life isn't really the most interesting thing in the world. I'm a professor at a college who does nothing but read and write on his free times. That's it."

"I just feel you've been pulling away more and more, Eli... Don't think I don't notice that you're isolating yourself." Elijah tried to defend himself but Chloe raised her finger, making him stop before even starting to talk. "Yes, you are. When was the last time you actually talked to someone about something that wasn't your work."

Elijah remained silent, making Chloe sigh and shake her head.

"Listen, Chloe, I'm fine. I'm just very busy..."

"I know, and I miss my older brother." Elijah's eyes softened with her words, feeling his own heart hurt as he couldn't lie that he missed the girl as well. "I know you have your life now and I'm proud of you for accomplishing so much, but I want to be a part of that life too! And I want you to find someone to share it with..."

Elijah scoffed, shaking his head and averting his eyes from the girl, making her only sigh and move closer to him, hugging him. He felt himself melt again, not being able to stay indifferent for too long in the company of his sister. He wrapped one of his arms around her as she rested her head on his chest and they just stayed there for a moment, enjoying each other's companies like they used to.

"I promise I'll be fine, Chloe..." his voice were so soft and quiet that he almost didn't recognize it for a second since he only talked like that when the girl was around.

"I know you will, but you're a stubborn man."

"And you're an stubborn woman."

They chuckled, staying silent after and just hugging each other. Elijah looked at the girl for a second, knowing she was right and that he was isolating himself again. But, for Elijah, that wasn't a bad thing. He much more preferred to be alone and hide himself from the world than handle it's judgement. Hell, the man already was judged by not showing his true self, just by showing that dangerous and untouchable facade of his. He could only imagine the headache it would be if he actively showed who he was to everyone and the judgement he would receive.

With a sigh, Elijah started running his fingers through Chloe's hair, hearing the girl make a pleased sound and making him smile. She was the only one who really knew him, the only one he felt he could trust, because she was always there from the start and never gave any reasons for him to doubt her. He didn't say it much out loud, mostly from texting but almost never voicing the words, because he knew Chloe's ego was almost as big as his, but he loved her and thought she was better than him in so many aspects. He would do anything if it meant the girl would be happy and keep the smile she seemed to always have had on her face. She had always been the nice sibling out of the two of them.

"How's Traci, by the way?" Elijah asked, breaking the silence as he remembered about the girl's fiancee. "Is she still mad at me about that poker game?"

Chloe laughed, nodding slightly. "She still say that you were cheating and stole her money when you didn't even need it."

"I wasn't cheating, I'm just better than her at poker."

"Mhm, yes. And you're also better than everyone else at everything, right Mr. Omnipotent?" she teased him, making him pinch her on her arm, without really hurting her.

"No, that's not true. I suck at cooking."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that spaghetti you made where you managed to make the sauce taste bitter." Chloe shuddered remembering the food, making Elijah laugh. "I still have no idea how you did that."

"To be honest, neither do I..."

They laughed again, the conversation turning lighter as they remembered some memories, staying on that couch until late.

***

Elijah was standing at the door frame of the guest room where Chloe was sleeping, watching his sister sleep calmly while looking at her with a sad expression. The night had been enjoyable and made Elijah feel lighter by just having her there, but he knew that she would have to go away the next morning and he would go back to being alone. He through that maybe she was right and he should try to find someone to share his life with, but he soon shook the idea away.

He hated dealing with other people's feelings. They confused him and only made him want to isolate himself more. Not only that but his own feelings were something he would always prefer to keep to himself. He didn't expect people to deal with his feelings, and in return, he didn't deal with theirs. Elijah had been told his whole life that he would have to deal with it at some point in his life, even as he was graduating and majoring in college.

" _Humans are by nature social animals_ ", he heard constantly in class. Well, he was more than willing to prove Aristotle wrong on that.

With a sigh he closed the room's door, letting Chloe sleep peacefully for the rest of the night, walking to his own room and changing into more comfortable clothes before laying on the mattress, looking at the giant window and seeing the city lights outside, knowing that out there the world was noisy and full of people, but there he was in complete silence and alone. He hummed to himself, turning to look at the ceiling and thinking about his day.

Nothing much had happened, it was a normal day in a way. He then remembered talking to one of his students on the way out, smirking to himself as he remembered the nervousness in the boy's face as he talked to him. It was always like that when he talked to a student. Only made his superiority complex worse to see people being _that_ nervous in his presence, and he honestly enjoyed it.

Elijah Kamski _loved_ being feared.

He shook his head at himself, seeming to condemn his thoughts for a second before turning to his side on the bed and closing his eyes, taking a deep breath before trying to sleep, knowing tomorrow would be a day just as busy as the one that had passed.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spare comments ma'am?


	4. Simple Gestures

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, first things first, thanks for reading so far and welcome to the first chapter where the plot is finally starting to develop (although the real shit will be on the next one ;] ). This one is a bit longer but please bear with me. 
> 
> Enjoy <3

As the days kept passing, Connor found out that his classes weren't all as pleasing as Elijah's. His professor for ancient greek philosophy was all of the things that Connor despised: Loud, moved his body a lot, and was seemingly very arrogant. He was not arrogant like Elijah, a better word for that man would be _mean_. The only one he liked other than Elijah was his professor for introduction to philosophy of religion — a little old and seemingly kind lady that seemed to know exactly what she was talking about. He liked those traits a lot.

Now, on Friday, he once again walked into a classroom to meet the last one of the professors and judge if he liked their methods or not. As he entered the class, he noticed how late he was since all of the first rows were already taken. He looked at Simon on one of the first rows, seeing the blonde look back at him with a "sorry" look. They ended up talking a lot throughout the week and Connor usually sat by his side now.

Not today though, apparently.

He sighed, looking at the back rows of the classroom and seeing the last one on the left side completely empty, shrugging and deciding to sit there by himself, placing his things next to his chair and taking out his phone. Niles was still in class so the only texts were from Gavin — _demanding_ him to wait for him at the entrance of his building once the class was over so they could hang out — and one from his dad wishing him a good day at college and asking if he really was going to go home for the weekend.

Connor put the phone down as he saw movement at the end of the class, seeing his new professor walking in accompanied of a girl who was carrying some books with some difficulty. The blonde woman had a bob haircut and was dressed in a flowy blue dress with floral patterns. Her presence seemed to be very "happy" for the way she was smiling as she put her stuff at the desk and helped the girl that was with her to put the books down as well.

She fixed her dress and hair a bit, seeming to take a deep breath before holding her hands in front of her body, smiling widely at all of the students in the room.

"Hello, everyone. My name is Leah Peters, I'll be your professor for introduction of social and political philosophy this semester." Connor raised his eyebrows as the woman spoke, noticing how the way she spoke made him get excited for some reason. "I wanted to welcome all of you and say that I hope all of you had a great week with great classes. I won't start my classes today since I expected you all to study a bit about what I'm going to talk about before we can debate about it. My assistant, Jane, will be giving all of you printed versions of my chronogram later so you can all do that."

Jane raised her hand, her face completely red from the shyness. Connor kinda felt bad for her.

The professor then nodded to herself and went to her desk, opening her laptop and apparently connecting it to the projector that was hanging from the classroom ceiling, since her screen started appearing on the board behind her.

Before she could explain what she wanted to do, Connor's eyes were caught by the figure entering the classroom. The difference from that day to monday was that he was wearing now a black button up shirt. The contrast between Leah and Elijah seemed to make Connor frown. The man entered with his already cold eyes while looking at the woman, who gave him a warm smile.

"Kamski! I was wondering if you were actually going to come..."

Elijah smirked, shrugging dismissively. "Had some stuff to take care of, but I couldn't miss this. Besides, you asked for my help so nicely..."

The sarcasm in Elijah's voice seemed tangible. Leah only rolled her eyes, finishing to set up her PC, showing a slide that seemed to be full of questions, she walked to the middle of her space, looking at everyone while Elijah only crossed his arms and looked down.

"I believe all of you met professor Elijah Kamski already, so I think he doesn't need any formal presentations. I called him today to help me with an activity I wanted to do with all of you." she started explaining, making Elijah turn his eyes to her, a small smirk on his lips that Connor couldn't help but find it charming. "Since all of you are arriving now at college I want to see what you remember of philosophy from highschool and help you guys to learn some new parts of those concepts you've learned through the years. I decided to make this into a little _competition_. The left side will be with professor Kamski, while the right one will be with me."

Connor blinked a few times. _He was on the left side_.

Once Leah finished talking, she signed with her hand for Elijah to move to his side, both of them climbing the steps to find somewhere to sit after she turned the classroom lights off so everyone could see the slides better. Since the right side still had some empty spaces a few rows down, Leah sat there, kindly talking to the student by her side. Connor looked at Elijah who was still climbing the steps, his eyes meeting Kamski's as he started to move to sit by his side on the last row. Connor seemed to stop working at that exact moment, turning his face forward and trying to understand the fact that Elijah was _right there_.

It shouldn't affect him much, it was just his professor sitting next to him thanks for the lack of other places to sit down on the other rows. But Connor couldn't help but notice the way his pale skin contrasted with his dark shirt. His perfume seemed to find his way to Connor's nose uninvited.

He refused to believe he was attracted to a man he only saw once and whose reputation wasn't really of a nice person.

"Hello again."

Connor looked back at Elijah, thanking any deity that existed for the lights being off so Elijah couldn't see how red he already was. Elijah was smirking at him, his eyebrows raised and he had that look that almost seemed to say ' _I'm better than you_ ' right in Connor's face. After a few seconds, Connor smiled at him to be nice.

"Hello, Mr. Kamski."

Elijah nodded, going back to looking forward and crossing his arms on the desk. He seemed to be waiting for something. It didn't take long before Leah started talking again.

"The rules are simple: each round there's going to be a question and each question is worth worth one point. Jane will be keeping score of who's winning on the board. First question will be for my side of the class, then the second will be for Kamski's side, and so on. Whoever knows the answer just raise your hand and answer it. If no one on your side knows the answer, the professor responsible for your side is allowed to answer once. Is it clear?"

A few people nodded, others were still trying to understand her words, but Leah seemed only to smile and look back at Elijah, raising her eyebrows before nodding to Jane.

"Okay, let's begin."

The first question appeared on the slide, someone on the right side raised their hand so they could answer. It was at this moment that Elijah poked Connor on the shoulder, making the boy look at him slightly scared at the sudden contact.

"Do you think this side can win?" Elijah's voice was just a whisper, only meant for Connor to hear.

Connor stoped for a second, only staring at Elijah blankly as Elijah's eyes looked at him in the dark, the only light in the room being the image being shown by the projector, casting shadows on Elijah's face that only made him look more threatening than he looked normally to Connor. His eyes were shining behind the glasses, but Connor couldn't exactly tell why.

"I don't know may people here... But I do think this side has some smart people."

Elijah grinned, seemingly pleased with Connor's answer, nodding and getting closer to Connor so he could still whisper at him without calling attention to them.

"She's only doing this because of a bet."

"A bet?"

Elijah nodded. "Whoever wins this will have to pay a coffee to each other."

Connor frowned, slightly confused with the bet, and Elijah looked at him with the grin still on his lips.

"I'm not doing it for the coffee, neither is she. I _always_ win our bets, and I just wanted to prove today wasn't any different..." Elijah raised his eyebrows and Connor blushed even more when he looked at him up and down, almost judging Connor. "Win this one for me, will ya?"

And then he winked.

Connor's world seemed to stop for a moment as he noticed Elijah really had winked at him. On one hand, Elijah was showing the superiority complex that people always talked about when it came to him. On the other hand, he had just winked at Connor, and he didn't know how to react. All the boy could do was mutter a small " _okay_ " before turning to look at the slides.

The scene seemed to keep replaying on his mind, making him annoyed at himself. That wasn't anything but a simple thing people did sometimes. It was not like Elijah was interested on him or anything, and Connor knew that. At this point, he was overreacting. He ran his hand through his face, noticing the next question appearing on the slide, realizing he had missed the last answer and the explanation Leah gave to that.

Connor looked at the question, reading it carefully before raising his hand. That seemed to catch Elijah's attention to him again. He quickly answered, confident in his answer, and Leah confirmed the answer. With his new information, he could see Leah's face of deception as Elijah's side got the question right. Meanwhile, said professor only grinned wider, seeming to be pleased with that.

After a few questions, more people grew confident in answering them as they got more and more difficult. Connor was trying his best to keep his mind on the task of answering the questions correctly and ignoring the man at his side that now looked more pleased than before since the left side was winning.

With the corner of his eye, he noticed Elijah offering his hand to Connor, making Connor turn to him again.

"I didn't ask your name." Elijah simply said, keeping his hand there for Connor to shake.

Hesitantly, Connor shook it. "Connor. Connor Anderson."

He was almost proud of himself for being able to keep his voice normal as he shook Elijah's hands. They were warm and soft, Connor noticed. He suddenly wanted to keep holding it, but had to let it go.

"Pleasure to meet you, Connor... You seem to be good at this philosophy thing, huh?"

Connor shrugged. "I've read a lot already while I was in highschool. I know a thing or two. Used to get straight A's."

"That's good." Elijah hummed, keeping his cold eyes on Connor while the boy tried not to freak out. "Keep like this and maybe you'll get somewhere."

Connor frowned a bit, feeling slightly threatened by Elijah's words. Elijah seemed to notice that and raised his hands, shaking his head.

"Didn't mean it like that. I meant that I can see you being a good student." he explained himself, grinning at Connor. "Let's see if I'm right, of course. There's a lot still to come..."

Connor nodded, thankful that Elijah finally turned his face away, trying to put his mind back on the competition that was happening around him.

 

***

After many questions, the competition was over and Elijah's side won. The man had a smug grin on his face and looked at Leah as of he had proved a point to her. Even with the upbeat personality of Leah, she looked slightly annoyed, and Connor understood why.

Elijah did nothing to hide how proud he was to win again. His posture and look showed he was looking down at the woman at that moment. Leah only walked to the front of the class, smiling at the students as she did at the start of the class and ignoring Elijah's piercing looks.

"Well, good job to the left side and professor Elijah for winning this one. And good job to all of you! There's a lot to improve still, like there'll always be, but all of you seem to remember the basics and even some more complicated parts of some important concepts. That's it for today, please read the book chapter for next week and have a good weekend."

As soon as she stopped speaking the whole class started getting up. Connor started to take his things and organize them while Elijah was still by his side, sitting down and looking somewhere Connor didn't bother to check.

In the middle of the class, he had taken out his laptop from his backpack to look into some stuff from the class that Leah was talking and to take some notes for later. As he was about to put it in his bag, he handled the laptop wrong, making his wrist hurt and drop the thing to the ground. He tried to catch it, but his luck was that Elijah was there and managed to see the disaster that was about to happen. The man quickly took the PC in his hands, looking up at Connor with a raised eyebrow.

"This thing seems like it's already broken and you want to break it more?" 

Connor quickly got that he was talking about the tape on the back of the laptop and the broken base it had. The poor thing had seen better days, Connor didn't even know how it worked after four years of innumerous falls to the ground and viruses that he accidentally got on it. 

The boy chuckled lightly, taking the laptop from Elijah's hands and putting it on his backpack where it would be safe before looking up at Elijah again.

"Thank you. If I broke this it would be a big problem."

Connor caught a glimpse of a frown on Elijah's face, but he quickly composed himself, putting his grin back on his face that made Connor swallow. 

"No problem. Be careful next time."

Connor nodded seeing Elijah nod back before getting up and starting to leave the room with the rest of the students that were still there. The boy only stayed there for a moment, still not knowing what to do before shaking his head and getting the rest of his things and leaving the classroom.

***

"I don't believe it." Tina said as some loud music blasted in the background, making the walls of the house shake. "So _Elijah Kamski_ sat by _your side_? And you _didn't_ get disintegrated just by staying near him?"

Chris chuckled on the couch, his mouth full of chinese food, while Gavin only looked at Connor with his eyebrows raised.

After he left the class, he found Gavin, Tina and Chris waiting for him outside. They were apparently throwing a ' _personal_ _party_ ' that consisted on the four of them, tons of food and drinks and loud music that the neighbors would be complaining about soon. The three of them shared a house nearby the college grounds that was owned by Chris' parents, which meant no rent for them. Chris sadly pointed out that, if they had another room, Connor would totally be invited to live with them. But it only took one look at Gavin to know that, even if he had the chance of living rent free, he wouldn't accept.

As much as he was still getting used to Gavin being a part of his life by being his brother's boyfriend and that Gavin was starting to be somewhat nice to him, something in Gavin's look showed that it wasn't a good idea. Connor was still part of Gavin's old life and this was a new one where his friends were nice and not toxic like in highschool. Connor would be just something to remember him constantly of who he was, just as Gavin would be a constant reminder of what he suffered. What they had now was healthy enough and it pleased both of them.

After the offer, the subject turned to Connor's week, and soon turned to Elijah, making the boy relive the moment of the wink again, which was mildly annoying.

"If you try to be friends with him and succeed, I swear to god Anderson..." Gavin's voice said out loud, pointing a finger at Connor.

"What? Why would I?"

"I mean, some people manage to get on his good side sometimes, right?" Chris was struggling to talk louder than the music. "There's a few students that he helped through the course. They end up very well succeeded when they graduate college just from the recommendations Kamski gives them..."

"Still, was his first week. What does he has that others in his class don't?" Tina scoffed, then looking at Connor and raising her hands. "No offense."

"None taken."

"You haven't seen this smartass in action." Gavin then said, shrugging. "Kamski probably noticed he had the smarts so he's observing him to see if he's a good candidate or not of his precious time."

Connor thought about it for a moment, remembering Elijah's words from earlier. He couldn't stop himself from blushing slightly thinking that Elijah might have actually noticed him in the middle of all of the other freshman that were in his class. 

"If he _is_ indeed with his eyes on you, I would be careful. Now you'll have to be better than ever to prove yourself." Tina raised her glass, as if she was cheering for Connor.

"Good luck buddy." this time was Chris' moment of raising his glass until all of them did the same, changing the subject almost immediately after.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any comments are welcome! <3


	5. The Offer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to chapter 5 everyone! Again, thank you for reading this far, this is such a fun story for me to write because I may or may not project somethings of my real life into the characters and I do appreciate everyone who's reading even if they're not really leaving any comments. Just seeing the hits and kudos growing is good to know people are liking it.
> 
> Specially I need to thank right now Ceeridwen99 for all the comments they leave here, specially the ones where they point out some mistakes I make through the story and always being so nice about it???? I really needed to thank you about this, fam <3
> 
> Anyway, this is the chapter where their interaction gets more common, and now maybe a certain professor is waaaay too excited to work with Connor-boy ;) But you'll only know that once you read it lmao
> 
> Enjoy <3

Connor's weekend was spent at home with his brother and reading some books for his next classes. Having Niles back by his side was comforting and he realized how he needed to relax after that first week. He could only imagine what it would be when that week turned into a month and how much stress he would be under, but, for that weekend, he got to only enjoy being back home.

But, in a blink of an eye, it was monday again and Connor had to go to college once more. He woke up too late, having to eat something quick before walking to college, still putting his shoes on while locking his door. He went directly to Elijah's classroom, feeling nervous to know he would see the man again that day but feeling more relieved after seeing the seat next to Simon was unoccupied.

The blonde gave Connor a warm smile that made him smile back as he was sitting down. He was glad that Simon was friendly with him, it was good to have a friend in class with him since Tina, Chris and Gavin were from another course.

"Hey Connor. How was the weekend?"

"Pleasant! I went home to see my family again... How was yours?"

Simon hummed, smiling. "I stayed home with my boyfriend, so I guess it was also good."

They started talking about their lives as they waited for the class to start. Connor excitedly sharing information about his brother and his family back at his hometown and Simon did the same while talking about his boyfriend and his group of friends. Apparently Simon lived with his boyfriend — whose name Connor managed to remember as Markus — and two friends of theirs, North and Josh. Connor wished he could know them someday, they all sounded pleasant whenever Simon talked about them.

Suddenly, both of them noticed the classroom going quiet, making them look to see what was happening, and soon Connor saw Elijah walking down the steps to go to the front of the class.

The man didn't look at anyone on his way down, placing his stuff on his desk and sighing before looking around to everyone's faces and crossing his arms in front of his body. Connor regretted sitting in the front row again for that class. _Too close_.

"So, let's go straight to the point. Who read the book for this week's class?"

A few people raised their hands, Connor being one of them. Elijah turned his face to Connor and the boy seemed to catch a glimpse of a smirk once he did, right before he went back to looking at no one in particular. More than half of the class had read the book, which seemed to please Elijah as he nodded and took a few steps back to write something on the board before starting his class.

***

  
As fast as it started, the class ended and people started to stand up to leave. Connor was getting his stuff when Elijah's voice called his name, making him look at the man almost scared, thinking he had done something wrong.

"Can you stay for a moment please? There's something I need to talk to you about..."

Connor wished that he could know if that was good or bad, but Elijah's eyes were too hard to read. Simon bid him goodbye as he walked out, seeming to look at Connor with a ' _good_ _luck_ ' look in his eyes. Once everyone was out, Elijah took a laptop from his backpack and walked over to Connor, putting it in front of the boy.

Connor got confused as he looked at it. It was a really good laptop — also really expensive from what he remembered — and he had no idea why Elijah was showing it to him. He raised his eyes from the laptop to Elijah's face, seeing the man just raise his eyebrows as if Connor was dumb.

"Sorry sir, I don't understand what you want..."

Elijah rolled his eyes, making Connor frown at him. He pushed the laptop closer to Connor, as if he was _giving it to him_ , and the idea made Connor widen his eyes.

"I can only imagine that there's some important stuff on your nearly completely broken laptop, and I know how annoying it is to lose stuff like that. I had this thing in my house as a spare so you can have it."

Connor blinked a few times as he looked at Elijah blankly. The way he said that was so natural, as if the man wasn't giving him a _very expensive_ thing. Once Connor realized he wasn't joking he raised his hands and shook his head.

"No, no. I can't accept this."

"Yes, you can. Specially because you'll need more space and speed for a few essays I'll be asking you to write." Connor frowned, making Elijah smirk at him. "I looked into your school records and you seem to have potential for something good. I want to test it. If you manage to prove me you do have potential, I'll be closely tutoring you through college and you'll probably get out in a few years with your major guaranteed. If you don't, well... At least you'll have a new laptop anyway."

Connor again didn't know what to say, taking some time to process his words. Elijah Kamski was there in front of him with a look that dared you to defy his judgement and offer, while also telling Connor that he thought the boy had potential to grow and he wanted to help. And it was only his second week as a college student.

"I'm... I'm really glad you think so, Mr. Kamski... But I can't accept this, I can do whatever you want from my own PC." Connor tried arguing, noticing his voice shaking as he tried to speak more. "I'm really grateful but this is expensive and I can't just accept–"

"Anderson, listen to me." Elijah cut him off, raising his hands and looking intensely to Connor, making the boy shut his mouth. "I know you're trying to be humble or something like that, but I really want to help you here. Take the laptop. I'll talk to you tomorrow about what I want you to research and write about, deal?"

He offered his hand, but Connor still hesitated. That was almost too much for him to process, and he still wished he could give the laptop back. But he could see in Elijah's expression that he wouldn't let Connor do that, so the boy only shook his hand, making Elijah's smile widen.

"Good choice. Have a good evening, Connor."

Connor answered with a weak ' _you_ _too_ ' before packing his new laptop on his backpack and getting up to walk out of the classroom.

 

* * *

 

Elijah had helped some students before when he thought they had potential. With his recommendations, those students didn't need to work so hard to rise in the academic world. Elijah Kamski was a strong name there, and whoever had the luck of catching his attention managed to grow under the wing of his fame, which usually was a very good thing.

When he saw Connor and the way he behaved he knew he had something good on his hands. His suspicion only grew to a certainty when the man saw the boy's school records. Connor was the type of student he used to put under his wing and carry to the top if they proved themselves worthy of his tutoring.

But Elijah knew very well that there was a little more to it than just Connor's intelligence. The students he used to take as his ' _followers_ ' were just as arrogant as him, determined to get to the top at all costs. He liked the ambition once he was also like that. But Connor wasn't like like that. He was almost _annoyingly_ nice.

If Elijah gave some of his old students a gift like he did to Connor earlier, they would've just taken it with a simple ' _thank_ _you_ ' and left. The fact that Connor refused it at first so quickly only caught his attention even more. Maybe that would be a new and interesting experience for him.

He didn't lose time when he got home, putting his hair up before sitting in front of his computer and looking for something he thought would be good to make Connor write about and see what the boy was capable of.

As much as he wanted to give him something challenging, something was bothering him about torturing Connor like he did with the others. Ironically enough, the research that gave Elijah his status was about human behavior and personalities so, as much as personal feelings made him uneasy, he _knew_ Connor wouldn't work properly under the same circumstances as the others.

Maybe he was doing that because he trusted Connor would surprise him. Maybe he just wanted a new challenge. Or maybe he just liked the boy, but that last part he decided to ignore. The only interest he showed on Connor was intellectual, he just wanted to tutor someone again. Except he couldn't deny that Connor was... _something_. He would firmly deny that the boy's charm was endearing in a way, brushing it off and saying he was just a friendly person. He would _also_ firmly deny he saw the blush on Connor's face when they were in the dark, the projector light being the only thing lighting the boy's face, and that he found that very charming. He didn't think about that in any way, according to his own mind.

Elijah sighed, running his hands through his face before finally thinking about something he could give Connor to write about, writing it on a piece of paper and putting it away. He closed his computer, staying there in complete darkness before getting up and walking towards his balcony, watching the city bellow him as he thought about everything and nothing at the same time.

 

* * *

 

 

That night, Connor put his new laptop on his bed and waited for it to start, looking at it still in disbelief. He had looked through it earlier and it didn't even have a scratch. It was basically brand-new and Connor was slightly freaking out about it.

Once it started, Connor finally got his confirmation that it was completely new once the setup started. He put his name as the owner and watched the screen for a while, still not believing he had just gotten _that_. That only made him wonder how much money Elijah makes to be able to have this kind of thing just lying around as a spare computer.

He took a deep breath, shaking his head and starting to mess with the laptop, putting his USB drive on it to transfer all of his archives there and download what he needed into it, feeling thankful that he wouldn't have to constantly worry about losing everything now that his computer wasn't on the verge of breaking. He needed to remember to thank Elijah properly whenever he saw the man again, remembering he didn't even thank him on the first place.

Once he finished everything, he turned the laptop off and put it away, taking his phone to give the news of what was happening in his life to Niles.

[8:20 pm] you: _ok, you won't believe it... my professor gave me a new laptop and wants to tutor me_

[8:20 pm] Niles: _Did you fuck him or something?_

[8:21 pm] you: _no what the fuck Niles_

[8:21 pm] Niles: _Oh yeah, I forget you're smart_ _sometimes._

[8:21 pm] you: _haha very funny_

[8:21 pm] you: _I still don't know what to do. he's one of the best professors here but I'm a little terrified of not being what he thinks I am..._

[8:22 pm] Niles: _You really don't need to worry. Whoever this guy is, he'll be impressed with you and I know that. You're smart and good at writing, specially if you like the subject you're writing about. But don't force yourself to do anything you don't want as well..._

Connor stopped for a moment to think about what Niles said. It would be a big chance for him to grow if he had Elijah as his tutor, but the pressure that would come with it was terrifying. Maybe he should refuse it and keep going with his life normally.

He sighed loudly, feeling as if this was a big decision for him to make like that. He looked back at his phone for a while before answering Niles again.

[8:26 pm] you: _thank you Niles. I'll think about it better in the morning._

He turned off his phone, putting it aside and laying on the bed while staring at the ceiling, taking a few hours for him to finally sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I hope all of you liked this one and if you did please leave a comment, I love to know what you guys think about everything I write so I know I'm pleasing you guys as well. I write for me, but post for you so feedback is always nice :D
> 
> Next chapter is almost all written already and we'll have Elijah's point of view again and I'm sure all of you will like it so I'll see you on the next one. <3


	6. Rejection

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooo welcome to chapter 6! This one is from Elijah's POV again and I hope y'all like it ;)

Elijah woke up way too early that day and, to his surprise, he wasn't feeling grumpy or anything. The man got up, stretching his body as he walked out of his room. The wooden floor was cold under his feet but he didn't mind it, walking to his living room and humming pleased as he stepped on the fluffy living room rug — a gift from Chloe that he very much appreciated since he could lay down on it to take naps next to the fireplace whenever he had the time. He stayed there for a while, turning the TV on to watch the news but nothing caught his attention.

The kitchen floor was also cold, making his whole body shiver sometimes, but the place quickly got warmer as he started cooking his breakfast. He ate it standing up on the kitchen, trying to plan out his day. He had to go to work that day to talk to Leah about a project she was making and asked for his help. Elijah still didn't know why Leah liked him so much, maybe it was just because of their stupid competition where they would bet stupid things with each other. She was too cheerful for him, but he would be lying if he said he didn't appreciate the woman's company. Even being his direct opposite, she was also someone you could have a good conversation with.

He then remembered Connor, taking a sip of his coffee as he smirked to himself. He found himself excited to talk to him and hand him the assignment be would be writing. He told himself that this excitement was to see what the boy was capable of and nothing else. It had nothing to do with the boy himself, just his capabilities. Absolutely _nothing_ to do with the constant blush on his cheeks whenever he talked to Elijah.

He finished his breakfast, cleaning the dishes and going back to the living room, turning the TV on again and seeing some old movie playing in one of the channels, letting it play so he could distract himself.

***

  
He pulled up on the parking lot of the college, getting out of his car and quickly taking his things to walk inside. As always, whenever he arrived, people started to talk about his everything and look a lot his way. He was tired of hearing the same whispers about his looks and the way he walked as if he owned the place. He didn't, but he _was_ one of the most important names of the college, so that was surely something.

As always he ignored everyone and went straight to the professors' area, seeing Leah there with a cup of tea in her hand. Leah's assistant, Jane, was typing furiously on her laptop, making Elijah snort. He knew Leah wanted to help the girl with her projects and, just as Elijah did with others, she took her to tutor the girl, but the girl seemed always so _stressed_ that Elijah wondered what kind of tutoring Jane was receiving from Leah.

The blonde woman noticed Elijah's presence and smiled at him, receiving a nod from the man. "Kamski, hello. Good morning."

"Hello Leah. And hello Jane." Elijah held back a laugh when the girl only grunted, completely concentrated on her work.

"Sorry she's... on the deadline to hand in her project. Shes running against time."

"Yeah, I believe you..."

He sat down at the big table, one seat away from Leah to avoid her ' _shoulder_ _touching_ ' he despised. It was one of the things he didn't like about the woman. Leah noticed that and only smiled, taking another sip of her tea.

"Any news? Tell me something interesting, Elijah Kamski."

He huffed out a chuckle, shrugging. "I'm about to tutor someone again."

"I said ' _news_ ', that's just something that always happens."

"Yeah but it's a freshman."

Leah narrowed her eyes, suddenly interested about what Elijah had to say. "It has only been two weeks. It's not _possible_ for you to have found someone already."

"Is that another bet?"

Elijah only smirked as the woman looked at him with something bordering annoyance in her eyes. He liked pushing the woman out of her characteristic happy mood and see that part of her. He _did_ study personalities and behavior after all, so, for him, it was almost a good way to look his research live in front of him.

He didn't like being around people, he liked studying them.

"Well, I hope you're sure about this. There's a lot of freshman this year and you're already picking one without looking at the others?" she shrugged, clearly not trusting Elijah's judgement this time. "Very bold of you..."

***

  
After a long talk with Leah about her project and a few jokes towards each other here and there, Elijah quickly walked through the corridors with a paper in hand to try and find Connor, knowing it was about time for the freshman to arrive for class.

He managed to spot the boy walking beside the blonde guy he usually sat with, confidently walking towards him and catching his attention. He tried to contain himself not to grin at the boy's look when he saw him. Connor wasn't good at hiding his surprised/scared expression once Elijah was on his sights, and that was amusing to the man to see.

He raised his eyebrows as he got close enough, seeing Connor fix his posture and expression quickly, almost looking as if he wasn't freaking out completely a few seconds ago and, again, Elijah _didn't_ find it interesting in any way.

"Good afternoon, Connor. As I told you yesterday I have a subject for you to write about. All of the specifications are on the paper. I really hope you come to my expectations..."

He offered the paper to Connor, but he didn't move to get it, which only made Elijah frown as the boy only looked down, slightly embarrassed.

"Mr. Kamski, I really appreciate the offer. I'm sure it _is_ a good opportunity. And I'm also really grateful for the laptop which really helps me out a lot, but I don't think I can take you as my tutor right now."

Elijah stayed still, only lowering his hand that held the paper. He blinked a few times, realizing he had just been rejected in a way. Connor looked up, seeming to regret his words and opened and closed his mouth multiple times, trying to find what to say.

"You'll really refuse this?" Elijah seemed to be in disbelief, his voice quiet.

"I know it may sound ungrateful, but I'm just not ready for something big like this yet. I admire you but I just started and I don't know if I'll be able to reach your expectations." he took a deep breath, seeming to look more firmly at Elijah. "I'm really sorry, but right now I won't give myself more than I can take."

Elijah kept silent for a while before nodding and taking a step back. "Very well. I won't force you to do anything."

Connor seemed relieved, smiling almost softly at the man, making him frown as he felt something hurt on him while seeing that smile.

"Thank you, Mr. Kamski." Connor sighed. "I'll understand if you want your laptop back..."

"No, no... It's yours. Make good use."

Connor nodded. "Will do. Thank you for all of this, it's an honor. Really."

Elijah nodded but his expression remained serious. Connor gave him another smile before saying goodbye and entering his classroom, leaving Elijah alone while he thought about what happened.

He then realized that rejection wasn't something he was used to. People usually would take what he had to give with open arms and a big smile. He had been rejected before, obviously, but something about being rejected _by Connor_ seemed to bother him.

Maybe because he was excited to work with the boy _. Maybe_.

With a nod to himself he walked away, still locked in his own thoughts as he walked back to the professor's room.

***

  
The worst part of the day for Elijah was the fact that he kept remembering what happened all of the afternoon. Everyone around him could notice something was wrong since the man was walking around with a frown and more distracted with his own thoughts than normal, but they never got to know what happened for Elijah Kamski to be so off that day.

"Kamski, you're really starting to worry me now..."

Elijah blinked a few times before looking at Leah, who looked at him with one of her eyebrows raised. He fixed his posture, realizing he was hunched over the table while thinking.

"About what?"

"You're either thinking of the most brilliant idea in the world right now or something happened, 'cause I see no other explanation for you to be like this." she said, crossing her arms and making Elijah raise his eyebrows. "You do stay a lot of your time inside of your own head but this is ridiculous... Is everything okay with Chloe?"

Elijah sighed as he remembered Leah and Chloe had met before when his sister came to visit him once. It didn't take long for Leah to see the way he behaved around the girl was different from everyone else, so it made sense for Leah to think that maybe it had something to do with the girl. It was one of the few things Elijah Kamski seemed to still care about except from his career.

"No, Chloe is fine. Nothing happened, you have _no reason_ to worry about me."

Leah wanted to know more but decided that it wasn't a good idea. The tone in Elijah's voice made it clear that he wasn't opening his mouth to talk about what happened and that he wouldn't enjoy people asking him about it, making the woman shrug and go back to look at the papers on her hand. With the silence back, Elijah started to go back to his own thoughts again, still trying to understand his own feelings about what happened earlier.

***

  
When Elijah left the college grounds it was already night time, some students finally leaving to their houses after another day of class. He walked distractedly through the corridors to go to the exit, looking down at his phone as he saw some texts from Chloe.

Everything then happened _too fast_. He heard someone scream a name somewhere next to him, making him raise his head by instinct. The only thing he could see was a body slamming against his with a lot of force, making him lose balance and fall back. To his luck, he managed to raise his head before hitting the ground, but the person who hit him fell over him, making Elijah lose his breath for a few seconds. After grunting with the slight pain he finally took a look at who was the guilty person, which only made him widen his eyes.

Connor was on top of him, looking at Elijah with his eyes open wide and his face _completely_ red. Elijah didn't know what to do, having Connor so close to him like this was almost _electric_. He could almost see every detail of the boy's face as he stared at him. So when Connor finally got up in a rush, Elijah almost complained, scaring himself with his own thoughts.

"Mr. Kamski, I'm so sorry! Are you okay? Did I hurt you? _Shit_ , I'm sorry. I was looking behind me and didn't see you there..."

Elijah got up calmly, fixing his clothes and looking a the boy as he felt his own cheeks burning slightly. He _knew_ he was probably blushing and he hated that.

"I'm fine. Be more careful next time, Connor..."

"I will, I'm sorry..."

Elijah only nodded, swallowing and looking behind the boy, seeing a group of people seeming to be terrified and trying not to laugh at the same time. His expression hardened at that and he just sighed, looking at Connor again before walking to the exit again, looking at the group with a cold look, making all of them look away as he did so.

As he got on his car, he stopped to think about what happened, suddenly realizing why the rejection from Connor affected him so much and taking a deep breath, deciding that he was going to forget about it. It wasn't something that could ever happen and maybe Connor denying his offer was better. He felt almost ashamed of himself as he drove away from the college grounds.

Still, all night all the man could see when he closed his eyes were the warm brown eyes of a certain student up close, staring back at him, making his heart beat a bit faster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, shit's gonna get real next chapter, just a warning... 
> 
> Thanks for reading and see you on the next one <3


	7. Change of Opinion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Chapter 7, I think you all are going to like this one ;) 
> 
> So, just a warning: I did put the smut tag in there BUT I feel like I should warn that there's a little NSFW part at the end of the chapter so, if you don't like that kind of stuff be ready.
> 
> Other than that, this chapter is a little longer cause I had a writer's block and I wrote it three times cause I didn't like it at first, but I'm satisfied on how it came out now. 
> 
> Also, I'm sorry if I take longer to post chapters 'cause just like Connor boy here I'm also in college and I have *so much* to write and read that it makes me crazy and actually affects my writing, so I hope you guys understand if I don't update as fast in the future.
> 
> Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this one <3

Connor looked around through the room, seeing he was the only one there and frowning at how early he had arrived. It was weird to be alone at the classroom like this, but he didn't complain as he rested his chin on his hand and waited. After a while, he noticed some movement in front of the class and soon his brow eyes were draw to Elijah's blue ones. They still looked cold as he stared at the boy with an intensity that made Connor shiver. The fact that he was alone with Elijah didn't help a bit.

The man walked calmly, placing his things on his desk as he always did before starting class but, instead of starting it, he walked towards Connor, leaning his body against his desk and smirking closely at the boy. His cold eyes seemed to burn now, and Connor blushed violently before whining shamelessly at the closeness.

Elijah only huffed out a chuckle, raising his hand to hold Connor's chin and bring his face closer before catching his lips on a kiss. Elijah's lips seemed to burn as Connor's entire body turned hot, making the boy want _more_.

So, when Connor woke up with the sound of his alarm clock, he felt nothing but frustrated. His whole body seemed to he hotter than normal, but Elijah wasn't there and he was on his bed with the annoying noise remembering him he had to get up.

He grunted as he turned the alarm off, annoyed not only for having his sleep interrupted, but because that wasn't the first time he had this same dream. The alarm clock had stopped it before it got _worse_. The memory of the dream where he detailed imagined himself bent over Elijah's desk as he used him made him shudder and shake his head.

He was completely fucked at this point, and not in the way he would like to.

With a deep breath he got up, walking out of his room to eat something and looking at the mess his tiny apartment had become in only _three_ weeks. He said to himself he would clean the apartment on the weekend, but it was completely spent studying and hanging out with some friends.

He stopped on his tracks as he remembered it was monday, swallowing and slightly freaking out. How would he face Elijah after all of the wet dreams the boy had with him? With a lot of shame, probably. That made him whine to himself, moving again to get some food from the fridge and heating it up, suddenly wondering if he could miss that class but ignoring the idea right after. He would have to face Elijah another time anyway.

With that, he only ate in silence, secretly asking himself if Elijah's lips felt like he imagined them to.

 

 

***

  
It didn't take long for Connor to realize something was off with Elijah that day. As the man entered the room and scanned the class like he always did, his eyes never landed on Connor, which he brushed it off for a moment and wouldn't really think much of it if it wasn't for the fact that the man was blatantly _ignoring_ him.

As the class went on Elijah made a question that Connor knew the answer, making him raise his hand and finally catch the man's attention. His blue eyes seemed to scan him for a split second before looking away, at a girl who also had her hand raised, letting her answer and going back to not looking at Connor as much as he could, not letting Connor talk unless he was the only one with his hand raised.

Connor felt almost angry at Elijah at that point, thinking it was because of him refusing to work with the professor. Either way, he was acting like a child. So, when the class ended, Connor wanted to see where this would extend to. He carefully made sure to leave his laptop on top of the table and leave quickly, staying outside the classroom and crossing his arms to see if Elijah would try to give it back to him or at least would collect it to give it to him some other day.

He waited for ten minutes and Elijah didn't even leave the classroom.

Frowning, Connor opened the classroom door again and saw Elijah sitting down at his desk with his chin resting on his hands, seemingly too distracted to even notice the brunette entering the room again. Connor really didn't understand why he felt the need of treating Connor that way for just refusing an offer, and he soon realized that it hurt in a way. He admired Elijah after all.

He calmly walked to his desk, taking his computer and finally catching the man's attention, noticing Elijah's eyes as cold as ice on him. Connor could see something bordering confusion in them, but it was so subtle that he asked himself if he wasn't imagining it. He almost felt annoyed at himself for smiling kindly at Elijah on instinct, thinking to himself that the man didn't deserve it, but his curiosity quickly sparked up when he saw something in Elijah's eyes change with that simple gesture of his. He didn't know what, though.

"Forgot my laptop." Connor simply said, making Elijah nod.

Connor nodded back, putting his laptop on his backpack and deciding to leave things like they were, climbing the steps to leave the room. But he still felt bad for all the coldness in Elijah's eyes towards him, he didn't like that _at all_ , which made him turn again to the man with a fierce expression.

"Did I do something wrong for you to be ignoring me like this, Mr. Kamski?"

Elijah's eyes quickly went to Connor's, studying the boy for a quick second and making Connor lose his breath for a moment. It was annoying how his eyes haunted the boy so much. He saw them up close when he managed to make both of them fall in the middle of the corridor last week by accident, and since then they just didn't seem to leave Connor's mind.

He really seemed to have a thing for smart assholes if he was being honest to himself.

Elijah didn't answer quickly, instead taking a deep breath and starting to pack his stuff to finally leave. "I don't know what you're talking about, Anderson..."

The tone in Elijah's voice seemed to be the last straw for Connor. He sounded as guilty as he was, just pushing away the subject so he wouldn't have to talk about it. Connor frowned in annoyance, frustrated with the man's attitude. He huffed, considering just leaving that room, but he didn't like to leave things unresolved, so he just stood there, looking at the professor.

"I'm talking about not letting me speak in class and acting like _this_." Connor said, his voice getting slightly louder as the annoyance grew on him.

Connor had actually no reason to be calling him out like this. It was his third class with the man. Maybe Elijah just had a rough day and it didn't have nothing to do with Connor _at all_ , but something about the way he was being treated just made him frustrated. Maybe those dreams were really getting to him and being ignored wasn't what his mind wanted. Still, he started that argument and he needed to finish it.

"Is it because I refused your offer?"

Elijah frowned for a second, looking almost offended at Connor's words and the boy saw as the man's eyes turned colder, his expression suddenly changing as he looked at Connor. Maybe he had said something wrong.

"Do you really think I would be _affected_ because _you_ didn't want my tutoring?" his voice was almost threatening, making Connor swallow, and the man only huffed out a laugh of disbelief. "Do you think you're _that_ important, Anderson?"

Connor suddenly shut his mouth as the question left Elijah's. Something about the way he said it seemed to hurt in a way that Connor didn't understand. Connor was just one of Elijah's students that managed to catch his attention and that was it. Elijah could simply give the chance he gave Connor to someone else and it wouldn't change a thing in his life. Connor would be just another one.

The boy lowered his eyes, suddenly ashamed of being in Elijah's presence, and nodded. "No sir. I just-"

"I'll pretend you just didn't do that, Anderson, for the sake of my interest on your intellect." Elijah took the things from the desk and stood close to Connor on the steps the lead to the door. _Too close_. "But I would suggest not accusing me of anything like this in the future... You don't _know me_ , Anderson. Remember that."

Connor only nodded, incapable of looking up to Elijah's eyes again as he turned around and walked away, feeling like the man's words crushed him somehow. He made his way to the exit, starting to realize he should've just stayed quiet.

Connor quickly made his way to his house, not stopping to realize as Elijah watched him from far away, the confusion Connor saw in his eyes even more visible now as he watched the boy walk away.

 

* * *

 

Out of all of the years Elijah had been a professor, that was the first time he actually felt bad for talking to one of his students like that.

He was being honest when he said that the fact that he was clearly ignoring Connor had nothing to do with the boy refusing his offer and that Connor didn't know Elijah at all. The boy couldn't be more wrong about his motives. The real problem was that he _wanted_ to look at Connor. He wanted to listen to him.

Through the whole week Elijah caught himself thinking about the boy and that was just annoying in his opinion. He ignored Connor in the hopes of the boy finally leaving his mind and leaving him alone. He didn't want to look at Connor so his mind would forget how the boy looked like, he didn't want to hear Connor so his mind would forget how his voice sounded like. It was a dumb and simple plan, but he hoped it would work.

But now, having to talk to Connor and hearing him think the fact that he rejected an offer Elijah made to every student he judged worthy made him have to stop his plan so he could talk to the boy. He was almost offended by his words.

But the face Connor made when Elijah asked if he thought he was that important almost made the man regret saying that. He would deny it, but he almost held the boy's face to try to make him feel better after his words. Thankfully he stopped himself and ignored his wishes. He was already fucked by seeing and hearing the boy, he could only imagine what would happen if he knew how touching him was also.

He sighed, shaking his head and trying to pay attention to the road as he drove away from the college grounds. He didn't want to go home, he knew that the silence of his house would betray him and his loneliness would probably make him think of the boy again, so he drove away from his normal route. Elijah noticed the streets were calm that day, his eyes going dark as he held the steering wheel with more strength and slowly started stepping on the gas pedal more and more.

He felt like a teenager again as he ran through the streets recklessly, the adrenaline running through his veins and making him want _more_. He knew it was dangerous and stupid, but he needed _something_. If Chloe was there, he knew very well the woman would scream at him to stop and be careful, but she wasn't. So he only went faster, seeing the world around him pass by fast as a blur. He didn't know where he was going to, he just drove through the streets as if he didn't have a care in the world, a small smirk appearing on his lips as he felt the adrenaline finally take over him completely.

He only stopped once he saw himself near the river, finally stepping on the break and stopping the car, taking a deep breath as he parked. He rested his body on his seat, feeling better as his thoughts mixed together and didn't let him focus on only one thing, making him frown as he realized he hadn't done that in a long while now.

He shook his head, deciding to enjoy the adrenaline that still was running through his veins, looking at the outline of the city through the window. At least his recklessness gave him a great view.

 

 

***

  
When Elijah woke up the next morning he ignored his phone and went straight to the kitchen, eating his breakfast quietly as he started to regret the events from last night. He could've been seriously injured if something happened to him while he recklessly drove through town as if he was in the middle of an action movie.

He was a wholeass adult and yet he acted as if he was a teenager again, all for some kind of relief he found in doing dangerous stuff. He was never fond of drugs, so he settled once for one that his own body produced on his own when he needed to calm down: Adrenaline. It was dangerously addictive. Putting himself in danger wasn't something he wanted to come back from his young days. The memory of the last time he did that — with the difference of him being _completely_ drunk at the time to add more danger to it — made him grunt and shake his head. He couldn't allow himself to be this reckless again. He promised Chloe he wouldn't.

When he walked back to his room to take some clean clothes he again ignored his phone, undressing through the house — one of the many pleasures of living alone in his opinion — as he walked to the bathroom to take a shower. He washed himself as his mind was still focusing on yesterday's events, grunting once his mind once again focused on the wrong part of the day.

He really wasn't happy about thinking about Connor while completely naked on his shower. It was very inappropriate, to say the least.

Sometimes, he hated how his mind worked and had a suspicion it was always against him. Remembering Connor made him remember his voice. His voice remembered him of Connor's smile. His smile remembered Elijah of Connor's lips. And after that, _it all went downhill_.

Elijah felt his entire body burn — he didn't know if it was from shame or _another feeling_ — as those thoughts crossed his mind. He tried to change the path his mind was taking with that trail of thought, but, as much as he tried, it only seemed to make it worse. The man rested his back on the wall, looking forward as he realized how truly fucked he was at that moment.

Elijah was all but dumb and he knew desire when he felt it, but it didn't mean he wasn't ashamed of it and found it incredibly inconvenient. What he truly didn't understand was why Connor caught his attention like that, making him not being able to keep his mind away from the boy.

He closed his eyes, thinking about just ignoring it and going back to his shower, but he found himself becoming frustrated with the idea of ignoring his wants. He felt his whole body burn again, this time knowing it was a mix of shame and arousal, as he wrapped one of his hands around his cock, touching himself.

He hesitated for a moment, not knowing exactly what to imagine. He didn't see enough of Connor to be able to imagine his body and how it felt properly, but, at this point, he was already too hard to stop. With his eyes closed he just stayed there, with his back against the wall and his hips thrusting forward slightly as his arousal grew more and more, imagining almost incoherent scenes of what he could, almost forgetting the shame he felt on doing that.

After a while, something more coherent came into his mind and he almost moaned at it. The thought of Connor laying on his bed while naked made Elijah shiver. The man didn't know what Connor's body looked like, but he did his best to try and give it a try. He thought about the boy looking at him with lust in his eyes, almost begging Elijah silently to fuck him, and, on his mind, Elijah gladly did it, simultaneously tightening the grip of his hand on himself as he imagined how entering Connor would feel.

That time, he actually moaned.

He wished he could've lasted longer as the feeling of touching himself with Connor on his mind made him shudder constantly. It felt like heaven for a moment, but unfortunately, Elijah didn't manage to control himself better as he threw his head back and his muscles tensed up when he finally reached his orgasm.

When he opened his eyes, he thought he would feel only the shame, but instead he felt _nothing_. It felt incredibly normal after he finished, as if he wasn't holding himself back before, and he just shrugged it off as it was probably because he was finally letting himself feel what he was feeling for a while now. He just finished his shower, changing into his clean clothes and leaving the bathroom, collecting the pieces of clothes he left on the ground on his way to his room.

And that was the moment Elijah decided to finally not ignore his phone, frowning as he noticed an new email and opening it, his shame finally coming as he saw Connor's name on the email as if the boy could now know what Elijah did on the bathroom.

 

 

" _Mr. Kamski,_

_I would like to apologise for what happened. I didn't mean to accuse you of anything, I just felt like I was being ignored and had wrong conclusions about the situation._

_But that's not the only thing I would like to speak to you about. I would like to know if your offer still stands and if I could still try to see if I'm up to your expectations. I know I've said no before and the fact that I'm interested now probably sounds a bit confusing, but I thought better about it and I would be really grateful if you gave me a second chance._

_Thanks for your time,_

_Connor Anderson._ "

  
Elijah stood there, looking at the message blankly, his mind going everywhere at the same time as he read the words over and over again. He had just came while thinking about the boy who was now asking for him to give him a second chance and tutor him. He couldn't do that, could he? He thought about it for a while, just staring at his phone before finally answering the email.

" _Meet me at the exit of the building after class today._ "

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)
> 
> Why do you guys think that Connor changed his mind like this? And also, right after being told by Elijah Kamski himself he wasn't that important? Of course the babyslut has a plan but that's for next chapter ;) 
> 
> I hope you guys liked this chapter and please leave a comment! Just saying you liked it already makes my day <3
> 
> See you all on the next chapter!


	8. Real Intentions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! I'm back! I'm sorry for taking so long to write this but college has been a bitch lately and I have no time for anything anymore. But I managed to finish this chapter so Here You Go!
> 
> I really hope you all enjoy this.

Connor remembered little about what happened last night, but it was enough to understand why there was a response from Elijah on his email telling him to meet him that night.

He remembered Gavin picking him up from his house and going out to his house, where he quickly accepted a drink. One drink turned to five very fast and the boy was completely drunk before he could even notice it. Gavin, Tina and Chris didn't seem to care it was a monday night and that none of them were legally allowed to drink. Connor just remembered Tina and Chris fighting about who was better at some videogame that Connor didn't care enough to remember the name while Gavin watched and laughed and texted Niles at the same time.

But Connor wasn't a happy drunk. He just sat there, thinking about everything and nothing at the same time, and suddenly the memory of Elijah basically humiliating him came back into his mind. Sober Connor felt sad, drunk Connor was _angry_. He remembered muttering ' _who_ _does he think he is_ ' quietly and drunkenly as he kept remembering what happened.

Other than that, Connor remembered how he felt offended for Elijah to say he wasn't important enough for him — even though those weren't the exact words that came from Elijah's mouth — and how he decided he wanted Elijah to look at him again and to think he was important enough. Drunk Connor _wanted_ Elijah.

He didn't remember writing the email, but he remembered that his idea was to seduce Elijah while he tried to tutor him because, apparently, he also became horny while drunk. Now, sober and looking at the phrase Elijah sent back, he felt ashamed but something inside of him knew that he wanted Elijah to at least look at him like before again. He didn't know where this need came from but maybe drunk him had made sober him a favor for once.

He didn't reply the email, figuring out that he didn't need to and put the phone away, still trying to wake up properly as the slight hangover bothered him.

***

  
The class went by slower than normal as Connor watched the clock to see if it was already time for him to get out of class. His leg was going up and down repeatedly as he felt anxious to meet with Elijah again. So, when the class ended, Connor was the first one to leave, biding goodbye to Simon very quickly before bolting to the exit and finding Elijah there.

The boy almost lost his breath as he saw Elijah leaning against the wall with his phone on his hand, his glasses slightly crooked on his face as his blue eyes seemed calmer than normal. That day he was wearing a plaid shirt, making Connor tilt his head a small bit. He looked way more casual than normal, and Connor seemed to enjoy that.

When Elijah finally noticed the boy, Connor gave him a gentle smile, seeing Elijah smile as well as he walked closer, taking something out of his pocket. "Changed your mind?"

Connor nodded. "I just needed some time to think, I guess."

Elijah narrowed his eyes, making Connor paranoid that he knew something, which was impossible. Elijah was a smart person, but Connor was pretty sure he wasn't able to tell that drunk Connor had done a impulsive choice in the heat of the moment. Either way, Connor got nervous at the man's look.

If Elijah did suspected of anything he seemed to brush it off and offer a piece of paper to Connor that he gladly took this time, opening it and freezing as he read the subject Elijah wanted him to search for. The word ' _desire_ ' seemed to be the only one in the paper, or at least the only one Connor's eyes were focusing on. _Did_ Elijah suspect of something?

Connor surely hated being paranoid.

"You have until next Monday to finish it and hand it to me." Elijah said, making Connor finally raise his eyes from the paper. "I'm sure you'll do a good job."

Connor nodded, closing the paper again and keeping it on his hand. "Any reason for the subject?"

The boy could swear a smirk appeared on Elijah's lips for a split second right before he shrugged, but he could've had only imagined it for all he knew.

"Not really. Just through it wasn't too hard to write a ten page essay on the subject. The research that made my name was about human behavior and there's a lot that can be said about desire and the way it affects people, don't you think?" Connor nodded, agreeing with the man and remembering that part of the reason for him to be there in the first place was the stupid desire. "Make me proud, will you?"

Connor could swear the man did that on purpose when he winked at him again like he did on Leah's class before. Connor blushed and he hoped Elijah couldn't see it. He just watched as Elijah walked away and Connor stared at the paper silently, still paranoid that Elijah suspected of something.

***

  
He sat in front of his laptop with some articles open, but his attention was on his phone as he texted Niles about everything that was happening, including — and specially — about Elijah.

[9:33 pm] Niles: _So what you're saying is: you are horny for your professor who has a big ego and was acting childish but your ego and your horniness are bigger than the fact that the man is probably manipulating you into accepting his offer?_

[9:34 pm] you: _something along those lines, yeah..._

[9:34 pm] Niles: _You know, if I was there I would slap some sense into you._

[9:34 pm] you: _I don't doubt it._

[9:35 pm] you: _I was drunk and didn't know what I was doing... I wanted to seduce him because, I don't know, I'm attracted to him. he's really gorgeous._

[9:35 pm] you: _I wonder if I actually would be able to do it..._

[9:36 pm] Niles: _Stop right there._

[9:36 pm] Niles: _You're not going to try to get fucked by that man. Connor, he's your professor and you can do better than an egotistical prick who would step on you at any chance he was given. Keep going with the tutoring if you want to, I believe it'll be good for you in the future to have a name like his on your side, but that's just too much._

Connor looked at the text, slightly annoyed that Niles seemed to be trying to tell him what he should and shouldn't do. Connor sometimes was too stubborn, and Niles telling him he shouldn't do it only made him more eager to do so.

The whole night, ever since he got home, he was thinking about the idea of actually going with his drunk self plan of getting the man's attention in a more sexual way. He wanted Elijah, his dreams with the man wouldn't let him lie about that, so maybe he could give it a try. It could ruin Connor's whole academic life if he wasn't careful, but he had a good feeling about trying that out.

Connor smirked, looking at the definition of ' _desire_ ' open on a tab of his computer and bit his lip as he said goodnight to Niles, part of him warning him that it wasn't a good idea, part of him excited to where this would lead him.

***

  
When Monday finally came, Connor had the research ready and printed out to hand it to Elijah. He was incredibly proud of himself and, even if his research had a bigger purpose, he could see himself publishing it as a small article someday. He put it in his bag together with his other stuff, quickly walking out of his apartment and going directly to college, getting there in just a few minutes.

He sat on his normal place, noticing Simon wasn't there that day, and just waited for Elijah to arrive. When he did, Connor could see he was as attractive as always, and the boy noticed that — after deciding to really go with his plan — part of his shyness towards the man had gone away, allowing him to look Elijah up and down without blushing while doing so.

Elijah did his normal movements of putting his stuff on the desk and write the class's subject on the board before looking at everyone in the room, looking at Connor last and keeping his eyes on the boy for a second more. That alone made Connor's body shudder and finally the blush came to his face.

The class went by smoothly and, this time, Connor was allowed to talk freely. He knew that Elijah's behavior was childish. ' _Do what I want and I'll let you do what you want_ '. He almost gave up on the man right then and there after realizing that small thing about him, but he found himself way more eager to see if he could catch the professor's attention in a place that wasn't his class room. So, when the class ended, Connor waited for the majority of people to leave before standing up and walking towards Elijah with a smile on his face and his research on his hand, seeing the man raising his eyebrows.

"You finished?"

"Yes, I did. Here."

Connor handed the essay confidently, seeing Elijah taking it and quickly flipping the pages to look at the content briefly, smirking at Connor.

"Well, I'll read it tonight. I'll send you an email to tell you what I thought."

Connor nodded, slightly excited to see if he would manage to reach Elijah's expectations and if he could go on with his plan.

"Goodnight, Mr. Kamski."

"Goodnight, Connor. Have a nice week."

 

* * *

 

 

Elijah's mouth was open on a silent scream as he came, his whole body tensed up and a small layer of sweat covering his body. On that moment, part of him was trying to enjoy the nice feeling of the orgasm while the other part called him stupid for masturbating again while thinking about Connor.

What he thought would happen only once became an almost daily thing where he found himself needing release and needing to think about Connor to have it. Even when he tried not to imagine his student there in various positions, Connor's brown eyes and lean body invaded his mind again and he found himself moaning and grunting for more.

When he opened his eyes to look at the ceiling, seeing that, again, he was alone on his bed with his hand and stomach covered with his cum, he almost felt frustrated. He missed the warm feeling of a body next to him, even if his opinion on people was still standing. With a sigh he got up, starting to go to the bathroom to take a quick shower and clean himself before putting some comfortable clothes and going to his living room, seeing the essay Connor had handed him earlier on the counter, open and already with some notes there.

He had to stop midway through his reading as he found himself hungry, which somehow led him to his room and his hand around his cock. Elijah groaned, knowing he had to finish reading the essay but not wanting to read what the subject of his desire had written about the matter. Only made Elijah think of how Connor looked while writing all of this and wondering to what extent the boy related to all he had written.

The work of a writer was always a personal opinion, Elijah knew that very well, so he wondered if the boy actually thought of everything he wrote about and truly agreed with it. He tried to concentrate, looking at some parts he had already read and nodding to himself. Connor had done a good job. He knew how to convince his reader of his ideas, and that was exactly what Elijah was expecting from him. Of course there were a few things to get better, but Elijah could teach him about those after a few meetings.

And that was when the man froze, feeling a shudder run through his body. He would have private lessons with Connor from now on thanks for the tutoring process he followed. He could manage pretend to not think about Connor while in class, once it only happened once a week, but seeing the boy _alone_ and more than once a week made him wonder if he could do that without losing his mind.

He swallowed, shaking his head and sat down to read the rest of the essay, knowing he was _completely fucked_ thanks to his own decisions.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❤️

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment! It'll make me very happy and criticism or compliments are always welcome! See yall in the next one.


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